This particular sin is a sensitive subject for me, because it’s a sin that I struggled with for several years. I shudder to remember some of the horrifying things that have crossed my lips… the slanderous statements, the blasphemy, the jealousy. It makes me sick to think about. I had certainly achieved expert level as a gossip, always justifying my sin in ways that let me be the victim. It was a type of addiction. My personality type swerves toward know-it-all, and I enjoyed being a source of new information. I am very good at storytelling, and connecting and remembering information. Only now do I understand how severely I was misusing a talent that God had given me to be used for His glory. But I liked how gossip made me feel. In charge, better than the miserable souls I was discussing, like I belonged in a group of important people. Until God made me His own and changed my ways that can be described as no less than evil. People who knew me ten years ago would be shocked to spend time with me today. The change is extreme. Now, through teaching me from His Word, He has given me such a hatred and fear of gossip. I still slip up from time to time, but with God’s help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I will continue to commit to using my lips for His glory. So, let’s research and embrace what God commands and desires from us.
THE BIBLE IS VERY CLEAR THAT WE MISUSE AND OVERUSE OUR MOUTHS!
Problem #1- We talk too much. Being silent is a lost art. When someone stays silent, it exudes wisdom and self-control. It is also to your benefit, as you have zero chance of saying something you will regret, and it’s unbelievable how much you will hear! The Bible says a sure way to recognize a fool is when they can’t stop talking and they love to hear themselves talk!
Ecclesiastes 5:1-3 “Guard your steps when you go to the house of God. To draw near to listen is better than to offer the sacrifice of fools, for they do not know that they are doing evil. Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word before God, for God is in Heaven and you are on Earth. Therefore let your words be few. For a dream comes with much business, and a fool’s voice with many words.”
Proverbs 10:19 “When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.”
Matthew 12:36-37 “I tell you, on the day of judgement people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” This statement from Jesus Himself is absolutely terrifying. Read it carefully and do not forget it.
Problem #2- Gossip
There is a portion of Scripture that I found several years ago that terrifies me. Examining it shook me, and drastically changed my outlook on the importance of what I say. Study the following: *(my comments in parenthesis)*
“Miriam and Aaron *(Moses’ brother and sister)* spoke against Moses because of the Cushite woman whom he had married, for he had married a Cushite woman. And they said, “Has the LORD indeed spoken only through Moses? Has he not spoken through us also?” And the LORD heard it. *(and He hears you and me, too)* Now the man Moses was very meek, more than all people who were on the face of the Earth. And suddenly the LORD said to Moses and to Aaron and Miriam, “Come out, you three, to the tent of the meeting.” And the three of them came out. And the LORD came down in a pillar of cloud and stood at the entrance of the tent and called Aaron and Miriam, and they both came forward. And he said, “Hear my words: If there is a prophet among you, I the LORD make myself known to him in a vision; I speak with him in a dream. Not so with my servant Moses. He is faithful in all my house. With him I speak mouth to mouth, clearly, and not in riddles, and he beholds the form of the LORD. Why then were you not afraid to speak against my servant Moses? And the anger of the LORD was kindled against them, and He departed. When the cloud removed from over the tent, behold, Miriam was leprous, like snow. And Aaron turned toward Miriam, and behold, she was leprous. And Aaron said to Moses, “Oh, my lord, do not punish us because we have done foolishly and have sinned. Let her not be as one dead, whose flesh is half eaten away when he comes out of his mother’s womb.” And Moses cried to the LORD, “O God, please heal her- please.” But the LORD said to Moses, “If her father had but spit in her face, should she not be shamed seven days? Let her be shut outside the camp seven days, and after that she may be brought in again.” So Miriam was shut outside the camp seven days, and the people did not set out on the march till Miriam was brought in again.”
There is so much to consider with this passage. Miriam initiated the negativity. Aaron joined her. Miriam’s initial problem was with her sister-in-law, Moses’ wife. Then the complaint moved to Moses, and ended in total pride. Moses was her brother. How often in life we tend to think that we have a right to speak badly about our own family simply because they are OUR family. So wrong. Moses was also her spiritual leader, God’s chosen man. You should truly be afraid to ever speak against God’s chosen men and women. The words of the LORD were, “WHY THEN WERE YOU NOT AFRAID…???”
Because I can promise you one thing- Miriam wasn’t afraid THEN, while she was running her mouth. But she was TERRIFIED standing in the presence of Almighty God- the One and Only Righteous Judge.
Miriam’s punishment was severe and literally painful. God came down and called her out in front of all of Israel. She was leprous for seven days, which must have been absolutely horrible. And she was separated from the camp, so she was in the wilderness, by herself, for seven days. I dare say she learned her lesson. I feel guilty reading about her punishment, because I know I deserve just as much and more for things I’ve said.
God forgave and restored her, for later, in Micah 6:4, the LORD Himself mentions her as one of the leaders of Israel. He says, “For I brought you up from the land of Egypt and redeemed you from the house of slavery, and I sent before you Moses, Aaron, and Miriam.”
Let’s read some more verses.
1 Timothy 5:13 “Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not.”
Proverbs 11:22 “Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.”
*(Discretion is defined as the quality of behaving or speaking in such a way as to avoid causing offense or discouragement, or revealing private information.)*
Problem #3- Women in our culture DO NOT talk to men appropriately.
I will catch a lot of heat for this one, but I don’t care. And I am not directing this to all women, I’m aiming directly at the women of the church.
- Respectful speech towards your husband. 1 Timothy 2:12-14, Ephesians 5:22. If you claim to be a Bible-believing follower of Jesus Christ, there is no way around it! You are to respect and submit to your husband. For any that take issue with this, remember, the Bible gives women perfect liberty to choose who they marry, completely sides with the woman in case of abuse or adultery, and even tells women they are welcome to stay single if they prefer.
- Nagging the men in your life. Proverbs 19:13. Nagging defeats men. You will never inspire a man by nagging him.
- Flattering a man who is not your husband. Proverbs 22:14. Performing flattery is a sin. Receiving flattery ignites a fire in our hearts that demands to be fed more, and is not easily quenched. So many affairs start because a man is not subject to encouraging words at home and is subject to flattering words outside the home.
If you recognize that you struggle with any of these sins, and want to change your ways to please the LORD, this is what I suggest:
- Confess your sin to the LORD and beg His forgiveness.
- Pray that the LORD will help you grow in the Spirit, Who will help you overcome sin in day-to-day life.
- Practice staying silent in conversations. Let others talk. Listen.
James 1:26 “If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless.”
A White Stone with a New Name 